it's been a month and two days since i left home. it's been that long and still no phone call from home. it's not that i want them to call me and ask me to come back but it would be nice to know they at least give a shit. it's not just that, its also wondering if my mom will get over her pride and either A) call me or B) let my dad call me. apparently, thats too much to ask for.
i'm not mad at them at all. i just dont want to visit a month later and still be in the same position from when i left. i know my sister will be there making a mockery of me and fueling my mothers flames against me, so whats the point? this whole experience has taught me something different. family isn't always there for you. my brother and partially my little sister are the only ones who have not yet turned their back on me and other people are the ones who are helping me and are there for me. my best friend and her family, my boyfriend, an old friend, a customer/friend. it's shocking and beautiful all at the same time and thank you so much to those people.
i had to also withdraw from school. what if i didnt get a job in time to pay for school? i risk not getting the deposit back and not going to school anyway. it turns out the deposit was non refundable but i explained the situation to one of the officers there and shes willing to refund it. $250 better to go back to my dad then go to columbia for free.
i just hope this all stops soon. i hope i get a full time job and a car soon. i want to go back to school by next semester and stop being a burden on everyone. none of them have make/made me feel that way but still, its on me that i feel that way. i feel like a bum :(
well, i must go shower cause i'm gonna watch tv with my best friend :)
love,
aurora